Dear all. Don’t go anywhere without a telly tonight as my cousin Jack-A-GooGoo will be starring in the new series of The Apprentice. This is the sixth year Jack has tried to get on the programme and his stalking Sir Sugar has finally paid off. Fingers crossed Jack wins as the prize is about a million quid, which would pay off most of Jack’s “loans” and get us on a World cruise.

Thanks Nelly Ryde (Jack’s manager, business partner and shelf-stacker in 99p Land)

(Above) This years’ hopeful Apprentices prepare for the new series which starts tonight