Breaking referendum news just in… Local Bremain campaigners are to challenge the legality of last week’s referendum over a technicality. It has come to light that many ballot sheets had misspelt European Union as European Onion, causing dozens of voters to believe it was just a referendum on the purchasing, or rejection, of multi-layered vegetables from across the channel, and as a consequence not of much historical importance. This could throw the results into disarray and mean a second referendum is needed. One in which Bremain would again offer an alternative way forward; one where we remained in the EU, whilst pretending we had left. Thus keeping almost everyone happy. Sadly this time round they only got 3 votes in the town, so they’d be hoping to do better if we get a second go. Christine Batley. Chief “Praying For A Miracle So I Can Still Buy A Time Share In Marbella” Correspondent. Beckworth Guardian

(Above) An example of the faulty voting slip