Good news from Beckworth Police. We have found the 12″ high Terence Nutkin Statue which was stolen from the Town Hall. It was found alive and well in the caretaker’s cupboard where he claims he had put it for safe keeping. The caretaker, a Mr N.Penge, is currently helping us with our enquiries whilst we see what else we can fit him up for.  I reckon he’s behind the heinous crime of all these brass instruments being found all over Beckworth, though he denies it. But let’s see what the water-boarding turns up. PC R Cowgrove

(Above) Little Trence Nutkin returned home safely