The KKK’s Partial Closure

Hello. It is with a heavy heart that I have to announce the temporary closure of the skate park in the Keira Knightley’s Kingdom adventure centre. This is due to large cracks appearing all over the Ms Knightey’s Film Career Mosaics, rendering the skate ramps and bowls a hazard. I will keep you posted on how rapidly this popular part of the KKK can be reopened, at present we are awaiting an expert inspection of Keira’s fissures. The rest of the centre, BMX track, jungle gym, climbing wall, archery corridor, vegan cafe and death slide, are mercifully unaffected. Have a good day, Beth Rochester. Acting Manageress, Keira Knightley’s Kingdom adventure centre

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(Above) Ms Knightley practicing in the recently redecorated archery corridor

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