Hello my flock. I trust you are enjoying the hot weather and preparing yourselves for Eurovision. I myself will be attending a “Eurotrash” party this evening hosted by the Bishop, which is why i am posting this message. As the Bishop’s parties can be a tad raucous and much deprived merryment will be had into the wee small hours, tomorrow morning’s Whit Sunday service will be starting a little later than usual. So please mark your calendars with the slightly later time of 3.45pm. That way I will have time to sober up. Also, please remember as it’s the Whit service to wear all white (including your undergarments and shoes). I trust I will see you at ALL at church tomorrow, looking like radient angels. God Bless You All. Cyril Knutsford, Vicar, Beckworth St Faiths

(Above) An artist’s impression of tonight’s Bishop’s Eurotrash” party