Shocking Eurovision news just in… I wonder how many of us watched in horror last night as local singing legend Michael “Mickey” Rice-Pudding was robbed of a deserved win at the international TV show of shows? His song, singing and shuffling around on stage were so much better than the other acts at the glamorous Israel hosted event. As a whole the Eurovision show was at the top of its game last night, but the voting is so unfair (and probably rigged?), I mean the UK couldn’t even vote for Mickey! Where’s the fairness in that? He should have least got a podium position, or been in the top 50! In a series of drunken tweets in the early hours Mr Rice-Pudding was ranting about how Brexit, and in particular Donald Trump, Theresa May, Nigel Corbyn and Jeremy Farrage, had sunk his chances as people voted for all the other acts in protest. Mr Rice-Pudding, who’s day job is collecting all the trolleys in the Sainsco carpark, did say he’d enjoyed his 5 minutes of fame, had got a nice tan in Israel and was off to get truly hammered with lats years winner Conchitta and host Graham Norton. I have to send congratulations to Mickey for not getting stage-invaded like we did last year (lets be thankful for small mercies). Christine Batley. Deputy Chief Eurotrash Correspondent. Beckworth And Slocombe Herald Incorporating Nightly Gazette