Good afternoon Beckworth. I’m sorry to be the one to impart bad news, especially this late in the day, but I have to inform all residents that I have taken Police advice and banned trick or treating once again this year… It appears to be the only way of keeping Beckworth safe this Halloween and comes after the ban was lifted last year which led to many, many reports of muggings by the town’s fearless under 10s. Most of the juvenile delinquents are believed to be travellers who camp outside the town from September to March (we’ve tried and failed every Autumn to get these scoundrels moved on but they claim their camp in forest near Beckworth is their “birthright” just because it’s called Gypsy Hill and the courts oddly agree with the blighters). Other young ne’er-do-wells are believed to emanate from the council estate so the police will put on more armed patrols on those litter-strewn streets. I know there will be an outcry from the vegan yummy-mummys and their Satan worshipping offspring, but I trust for the majority of us the ban will make enjoyment of all-hallows eve much safer and fun. Thanking you most warmly. Aashif Ackworth. Mayor. Beckworth Town Council