Raise A Toast To Toast

Alright fans, how you doing? Yes. it’s me, TVs own gorgeous Greg. In celebration of National Toast Day (and as things are a bit quiet whilst i’m not presenting any top quality telly at the moment) i’m launching a new service to run alongside my Fruit & Veg rental service. I’m offering to deliver toast (with butter or without) to your home or work… It’s like having the nations’ favourite toast always on tap! I can even deliver to your mates. So why not give me a try? You can text through orders if you just can’t be arsed to phone or pop in person. So what you waiting for? Enjoy toast without the fuss today. Yours, Greg Wallace. Master Gregs the Grocers.

Do A Veggie A Favour Today

Beckworth_Greg's Grocery Bicycle

Alright fans, how’s it hanging? Yes. it’s me, TVs own handsome Greg. Things are a bit quiet here as i’m not presenting any high-brow TV programmes at the moment, so i’m working extra hard on my Fruit & Veg rental service. I’ve got lots of veg going off due to poor sales and as today is World Vegan Day I thought I could off load it… So if you know any veggies why not show how much you like them and rent a ruddy big box of veg for them. I’m offering to deliver, on me bike, crates of overripe “organic” veg by the hour… for up to 6 months at a time!!! I must be nuts but, for a bit of extra cash, i’ll even cover the stuff in mud so you can look like you know your way around an allotment (but without having to lift a (green) finger or get your trendy hands dirty). So why not give me a try and give your “meat and fish-fearing” chums a treat. You can even text through orders if you just can’t be arsed to phone or pop in person. So what you waiting for? Fill a vegans’ squat with borrowed foodstuffs today. Yours, Greg Wallace. Master Gregs the Grocers. Yours, Greg Wallace. Master Gregs the Grocers

Do Ya Mum A Favour This Sunday

Alright fans, how ya doing? It’s me, handsome Greg from off your telly. And as i’m not presenting any high-brow TV programmes at the moment i’m working extra hard on my new Fruit & Veg rental service. And get this, i’m now branching out into flowers. Just in time for Mother’s Day. That’s right, rented flowers delivered to your Mum’s door by Greg’s Fruit & Veg Hire. Simply put, i’m offering to rent out (and deliver on me bike) bundles of flowers for up to 6 months at a time!!! I must be crazy but for a bit of extra dosh i’ll even throw in a vase. So why not give me a try and give your Mum the treat she deserves this Mothering Sunday. You could even buy her a marrow or some spuds at the same time and see her little old wrinkled face light up ’cause she knows you love her lots. Yours, Greg Wallace. Master Gregs the Grocers

Beckworth_Greg's Grocery Bike With Flowers

(Above) Why not let TV’s handsome Greg Wallace deliver rented flowers (and veg) to your dear old Mum this Sunday?

Improve Your Image Amongst Trendy Friends

Alright fans, how ya doing? Missing me being on TV I’ll wager? Don’t worry I’ll be back on soon. In the meantime i’ve got a nifty new business venture for you… Are you too scared to invite poncy veggie friends round for a slap up dinner ’cause you only keep frozen meat in the house? Maybe you’re intimidated by cocky mates who know the difference between King Edwards and Granny Smiths? Or don’t want to look like a right muppet down the pub as you’ve said you grow your own? Maybe, just like me, you lead too hectic a celebrity life to keep fresh groceries in the house but want to impress birds with your fruit salad when you get them home after 18 pints and a ruby (a curry). If the answer is yes then my new delivery service is for you… Greg’s Fruit & Veg Hire. Simply put, i’m offering to rent out (and deliver on me bike) bowls of overripe “organic” fruit, handfuls of greens (sprouts, cabbage etc) or sacks of sad-looking spuds by the hour… for up to 6 months at a time!!! I must be nuts but, for a bit of extra cash, i’ll even cover the stuff in mud so you can look like you know your way around an allotment (but without having to lift a (green) finger or get your trendy hands dirty). So why not give me a try and give your “metrosexual” self-sufficiency image a boost. You can even text through orders if you just can’t be arsed to phone or pop in person. So what you waiting for? Fill your home with borrowed foodstuffs today. Yours, Greg Wallace. Master Gregs the Grocers

Beckworth_Greg's Grocery Bicycle

(Above) Greg Wallace doing the rounds on his bicycle delivering rented groceries to Beckworth residents earlier today