Join Us At The MayDay Market This Sunday

Hello Beckworth. It’s your glorious Mayor here… Don’t forget tomorrow, the annual french Le Marche De Fromage Et Onion (Cheese And Onion Market) will be back in town. All sellers have been in quaranteen & tested daily for a couple of weeks whilst staying at the local campsite, so are Covid free. This is the first chance to buy expensive french cheeses and onions directly from stall-holders and to be abused in two languages. Last years online event was sadly a debacle not to be repeated. Cheese doesn’t travel well in the post from France… Due to social distancing we will be limiting numbers entering the market and queueing systems will be in place… Alcohol will be prohibited offered due to previous drunken incidents by a rowdy few. 

As is traditional (face mask wearing) Emmental Fromagiers will set off from from Town Hall steps at 10am on Sunday and parade along Floyd Street to the market.

If the weather perks up (it doesn’t feel like Spring, April has been so cold) there will be events for the whole family (maximum six members excluding small animals). Socially distanced morris dancing by The Beckworth Bothamers is likely, but there’ll be no clacking of sticks or such interaction between them. A kite display by local celebrity Noel Edmunds is very likely as Noel says he needs the publicity and of course the highlight of the afternoon will be the crowning of Beckworth’s Miss Garlic 2021 (He crown and robes will be thrown to her or him from a safe distance (2 metre plus).

This year the “now all electric” steam-driven carrousel and dodgems” will be for viewing only from a safe distance, as will Flintlock Farm’s Mobile (Non)Petting Zoo. Derek Shipston’s (non-violent, non-swearing PC) Punch & Judy show is likely to be set up to entertain Covid free children and the Beckworth & Crewbury Historical Re-enactors plan to stage their once popular The Life Of Joan Of Arc at The Sports Field.

Have happy and safe Mayday.Thanking you most warmly. Aashif Ackworth. Mayor.

Prince Philip Funeral To Be Shown On The Biggish Screen

Hello my loyal subjects of Beckworth. Firstly may I extend, on your behalf, my condolences to HM The Queen for the loss of her dear husband of thirty years, Prince Philip. Secondly due to my personal generosristy I will allow the general public to view the funeral on biggish office TV which I will place, facing the street, on my windowsill. Due to social distancing please keep your family bubbles 2metres apart from others (or sit in your cars) and do refrain from drinking, swearing & picnicking outside the council offices. I do hope you’ll join me in watching the Duke’s last journey. Thanking you most warmly. Aashif Ackworth. Mayor