Apologies For The Substandard Eclipse Experience

Hello. I just wanted to apologise for the no-show of Dr Brian Cox today, he was apparently double booked to talk about sun and moon stuff on breakfast telly and didn’t tell us. Still at least Bill Oddie showed up to share his binoculars with us all. Though to be honest because of the dense smog over the pub car park there was nothing to see. And it didn’t even go dark. Or cold. But on a brighter note we did sell out of drinks and a dozen people had a boozy start to their day. It was like a foggy beach party. But without the sand. And the music. Thanks to all who attended, you made the weeks of organising almost worth while. Cindy Carmarthen, Bar Manager, The Blind Badger Pub & Venue

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(Above) Today’s solar eclipse, with Bill Oddie in the bottom left, as seen earlier today

Missing Musketeers

Well done to the BBC for their very interesting drama series Musketeers. My only criticism is why have they fallen into the decades old trap of leaving out the fifth and sixth musketeers, Darius and Pathos, who were central characters in the original book. The hapless musketeers may have been described as sexist, flatulent and a tad portly but surely that would only have added to the dramatic story lines? For me their noticeable absence spoilt the enjoyment of an otherwise spotless documentary series. Perhaps the cull was due to the BBC cuts that also have seen the broadcasters move a frankly uneventful Bill Oddie-less Spring Watch to a shed in the wilds of northern England? Ray Eastleigh

Chris And Daniel Take To The Air

Hello all. I just wanted to share the great news that TV naturist, novice-pilot and local celeb, Chris Packham has this week raised an amazing £186.72 for Beckworth hospice by flying solo in a bi-plane for over 15 minutes. It was the first time Chris, with the aid of his map-reading best friend Daniel, had ever flown solo and although he’d hoped to be airbourne for at least 6 hours he was still upbeat. Chris and Daniel were quoted as saying “Wow, that was the thrill of a life-time. We only tried flying a couple of weeks back as a bet with Bill Oddie but now we’ve got the bug. And raising all that money made me feel like the Last Of The Famous International Playboys!” When asked why they hadn’t flown for longer Pilot Peckham explained “Well i’ve only had a couple of lessons so far and although Dan is a Handsome Devil he’s a ******* lousy map reader. So instead of flying to the south of France to see Morrissey in concert, we crash landed soon after take-off in a field near Kings Lynn.” Co-Pilot Daniel added “Still at least no one was badly injured and me and Chris had a good laugh about it, once we’d got out the burning wreckage.” On being discharged from hospital the intrepid duo were asked if they planned to continue flying? A good humoured yet shaken Mr Christopher Reckham and Mr Daniel Owl replied “Of course, I Started Something I Couldn’t Finish… All I need is someone to lend us another ******* plane” So it’s well done to Chris and Daniel. Christine Batley. Chief Flying Correspondent. Beckworth Guardian

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(Above) Chris and Daniel airbourne just prior to their near-fatal crash landing in Kings Lynn