Hello. This Christmas your local naturists, the Beckworth and Slocombe branch, are having a “no clothes allowed” day-trip to Europe’s capital of naturism Bournemouth. The day will include getting two trains there (changing in London), a skinny-dip in the sea, betting on the pier’s slot machines (we need to check there is a pier), and fish and chips on the beach (we’re hopeful there is a beach, if not we’ll sit in a cafe). But the icing on the cake will be an evening watching and shouting obscenities at the UK’s first naturist panto, Nudes In The Wood. My close friend Wayne knows the producer and she says it’s going to be a family friendly panto, with lots of songs and will star one or two celebrities, though none have confirmed yet. So you why not join us on our naked fun day out? Lunch is included in the price of the day trip, which is only £334 per person. At the moment we’re not sure of a date, but it will be in December so keep that month free. Lionel T. Worton. Secretary. Beckworth and Slocombe Naturists

(Above) Bournemouth; the ideal destination for a December skinny dip