Tag Archives: OAPs

Calling All SCABs

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Hello everyone. My campaign to ban shopping bags from Beckworth is off to a flying start, in just two weeks over 21 people have signed my partition.

Therefore the time is ripe to hold our inaugural SCABs (Senior Citizens Against Bags) meeting. I propose meeting in the Blind Badger as it’s the nearest pub to my house and if we meet at 6 – 7 it’s happy hour. So how about getting together next Tuesday, 14 May? Let me know if you’ll be coming, and if there’s likely to be more than 6 of us I can reserve a table. Together we can get some plans formulated, so please pick SCABs to get bags binned for good. Thank you, Ray Eastleigh

Pick SCABs

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Hello everyone. I think it’s high time we banned bags from being used when shopping in Beckworth (handbags and woven bags would be exempt). Bag banning has proved successful in other towns and I can’t see why it shouldn’t be popular here.

As one of the more trusted members of society I hereby toss my hat into the ring to get the anti-bag ball rolling. To this end I have formed SCABs (Senior Citizens Against Bags) and urge you sign my online partition. I’ve no idea how one signs something that isn’t paper based but maybe one of our local computer johnnies can help? Otherwise it’s probably best to send me a signed postcard, or notelet.

So please pick SCABs to get bags binned for good. Ray Eastleigh

The O APprentice

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Good evening Beckworth. I’m very pleased to see my favourite apprenticeship based TV programme, The Apprentice, is returning to our screens for its 32nd series.

But come on Sir Albert Sugar, how’s about a version for us more mature members of society? I speak for many of my generation when I say there’s plenty of juice left in the old dog, and like many I’d be up for coming out of retirement to work at your computer factory. And being an insomniac I could even work the night shift.

So Sir Sugar, don’t write us off and concentrate on youngsters, give us a punt, you’ve got nothing to lose. The BBC could even call it the Octogenarian Apprenticeship Protoges and put it on at a sensible time. Just before Bargain Hunt. Thanks, Ray Eastleigh

SID JAMES

(Above) Sir Sugar overjoyed at the prospect of presenting another series of The Apprentice