UKIP Sponsored Common Wealth Games Closing Ceremony Cancelled

Hi, sorry for the very late notice but just to let you know that tonight’s alternative closing ceremony for the Commonwealth Games on Beckworth’s sports field has been cancelled. The local branch of UKIP, who tried to organise the event, have apologised and put the blame squarely at Noel Edmunds’ door. He’s refused to perform a stunt kite display to round off the games, but in his defence a fuming Mr Edmunds says this is just because he, and the other performers, still haven’t been paid for the opening ceremony. And like most of us he says he’d like to watch the real Glasgow closing ceremony on TV, whilst sharing a bottle of wine with his close friend Mr Blobby. Thanks Natalie Clifton. Tourist Information.

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(Above) Mr Blobby fishing in his friend Noel Edmunds’ pond earlier today