News just in… Beckworth’s world famous Museum of Cheese has announced plans to merge with a neighbouring museum in a drive to save money and increase visitor numbers.  Spokesperson and curator for the MoC, part-time popstar Will Young, was quoted as saying “with every museum chasing funding, more and more exhibitors will have to join together to survive…” he went onto add “we tried to merge with The Paris Musée du Onions but they said we were too far away and they hated the English. So we are very lucky to have joined forces with a museum just a few miles away, and who’s remit compliments ours perfectly.” We were still in the dark until he announced they would merge with the little known Slocombe Chalk Museum. The new combined “supermuseum” will focus on the history of cheeses and chalks and even boast a souvenir shop and cafe. It will likely be sited in Crewbury, probably in the old public toilets as the rent is cheap. They hope to open in just a few days once the urinals have been cleaned. I’ll keep you posted about when the grand opening is. Christine Batley. Chief Carbonated Limestone & Coagulated Milk Product Reporter. Beckworth Guardian

(Above) Will Young announcing plans for the Museum of Cheese earlier today