Category Archives: Blind Badger Public House

Christian Randy Is Back This Friday

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Great news for all of you religious music fans as Randy, the country’s number one sexually-deviant wooden “friend of Jesus,” is back performing his hits at Beckworth’s number one real ale venue. This Friday night he’ll be on stage with his close relatives, amateur ventriloquists Uncle Len & Aunt Nancy Wheely, and the threesome will be getting our bank holiday started with a real Christian swing. The born-again hitmaker’s are promising to sing all of their “C of E” cover versions including Killing In The Name Of, Miley Cyrus‘s Wrecking Ball (featuring Aunt Nancy twerking) and Tom Jones’s Kiss, which will bring God into our hearts, or so their agent has told me. They will also be signing copies of their heavily discounted debut album Do You Know Jesus?, which reached number 502 in the Christian charts on it’s release last year. It’s only a £5.50 on the door and this weekend’s featured ale at the pub is Whitsun’s Wee. Warning: If you don’t like people singing about Our Lord, or dummys, then please stay at home! Cindy Carmarthen, Bar Manager, The Blind Badger Pub & Venue

Uncle Les Small

MayDay P*** Up Tomorrow

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This is a message to all of you who like heavy metal and getting drunk on cheap ale. Tomorrow, to celebrate May Day, local heavy metal covers bands, Bachman Turner Overdraft, The Whom, Motorshed, and Ron Maiden will be rocking our back room venue all day. We’re hoping headliners Zed Lepellin, coming all the way from Japan via Swansea airport, will clear immigration in time to play, but if not Bachman Turner Overdraft have offered to play their set all over again (and we doubt anyone will notice if they do). It’s only a fifteen quid on the door, from 10am, and Mayday’s featured ale at the pub is Meaty Beaty Big & Bouncy. Warning: If you’re coming for lunch with the family it’s probably best to sit outside in the beer garden! Cindy Carmarthen, Bar Manager, The Blind Badger Pub & Venue

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(Above) Rock and Real Ale loving Blind Badger regulars arriving early for tomorrow’s gig

Funky Prince Announces One Off Gig

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Hello all, i’ve been bursting to tell you all but sworn to secrecy until today because the diminutive Prince has chosen The Blind Badger to play a one off gig to launch his CD and try out his backing band. Yes, funky Royalty will be playing in our back room this Friday from 8.30. He will be playing tracks from his album “Purple Reign” which includes songs by Chas & Dave, the Beatles and Coldplay. The Prince, who likes to go incognito using the English sounding name Eddie Windsor, told me over the phone “My favourite song on the album is a cover of my namesake Prince’s Raspberry Beret. It was seeing him on YouTube that gave me the idea of launching a singing career. I’d been looking for a goal in life for sometime and singing and dancing fitted the bill. Mama says I was born to perform and I haven’t found a macho role like the one’s my brothers have created for themselves… Andrew likes to fly helicoptors, Charles talks to trees and Anne is very close to his horses” So come and give your support to Prince Eddie as he tread the boards for the first time this Friday. Tickets are a steal at £12 and as an added incentive out-of-date Twigletts are half price. Resident DJ Diddy David Dimbleby will be spinning the tunes at his late night disco, so see you there. Cindy Carmarthen, Bar Manager, The Blind Badger Pub & Venue

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(Above) Prince Edward “rock’s out” during rehearsals in a pretend forest earlier today